What Is Republicare?

Republicare is the non-socialistic, non-handout, non-affordable insurance program that insures health-care providers against catastrophic profit-margin problems.

Republicare includes all insurance providers, lobbyists, pharmaceutical manufacturers, medical-equipment providers, banks, savings & loans, and collection agencies licensed by Republicare, Inc. to take money from people who claim to be “sick.”*

* This includes “seniors”—defined by Republicare as any living person too enfeebled by age to know that he or she should have put away enough money to pay for keeping him or herself alive, yet is too stubborn to expire.

—Bruce McCall. For more: http://nyr.kr/194BUbM

(Source: newyorker.com)

A cartoon by Christopher Weyant. For more cartoons from the issue: http://nyr.kr/16FOIXo

(Source: newyorker.com)

Matthew McKnight on Obama’s Morehouse speech and the first black President’s responsibilities to African Americans: http://nyr.kr/10Syum5

(Source: newyorker.com)

Jeffrey Toobin: Should the White House Counsel have told Obama about the IRS investigation? http://nyr.kr/11WrWt1

(Source: newyorker.com)

A look at some of the most striking numbers from the subcommittee’s report on Apple’s taxes: http://nyr.kr/12sEGCA

(Source: newyorker.com)

In a dramatic departure from existing White House procedures, President Obama requested today that his staff start cc’ing him on stuff.

Look, I know a lot of you think I’m really busy and you don’t want to bother me,” the President reportedly told his staff in an Oval Office meeting. “But cc me anyway. It’s good for me to keep up on what’s going on around here.”

—Andy Borowitz. For more:  http://nyr.kr/12MlQYQ

 

(Source: newyorker.com)

My darling David,

Don’t let these earthly considerations stand in the way of our relationship. Getting to know Tumblr has been the biggest joy of my life. I have never felt so young, so alive, so full of hope for the future as when I am watching your metrics rise exponentially each day.

Oh, I was looking at some of your photos online the other day. Please don’t wear your Google Glass when I introduce you to my board. I want them to approve of you.

All my love, Marissa

—Caitlin Kelly imagines an exchange between Marissa Mayer and David Karp: http://nyr.kr/19XTw6V

A cartoon by Sam Gross. For more cartoons from the issue: http://nyr.kr/18cXREq

Matt Buchanan on the Xbox One: It’s “the most forceful attempt of any company yet to colonize your living room—to be the single most important box attached to your television, if not the only box.” http://nyr.kr/10jxM4A

(Source: newyorker.com)